“You sure Foggy will be okay?” Luke asked while he shouldered his bag.
“No,” Jess sighed. “But he said he’ll clear up things with Matt alone so I’ll respect that.”
“Yeah.” Luke nodded. “He knows where to find us and that we’ll be there if he needs us.”
“Spoken like a real hero,” Jess teased.
Then she, too, took her things and turned to the door.
They said goodbye to Doctor Strange and Wong, thanking them for the help and hospitality.
“I’m always happy to help in case of an emergency,” Strange said and added quickly, “And I trust that responsible adults can properly distinguish an emergency from a mild inconvenience.”
“We’ll do our best,” Jess smirked. “See you, Doc.”
“It’s Doct…,” Strange said but then sighed, “Good bye, Ms Jones. Mr Cage.”
They waved and went to the main exit. At the door they met Colleen, Danny and Misty. Danny and Luke hugged, exchanging heartfelt apologies and sincere dismissal of said apologies as unnecessary. After a few minutes, the women collectively rolled their eyes.
“You remember we all have lunch together tomorrow?” Colleen asked.
“Yeah,” Misty said. “Maybe postpone the cuddle session until then? Before the cab driver gets enough of waiting and drives off?”
“Right, sorry.”
Danny and Luke let go of each other, patting each other’s shoulders one last time. Hand in hand, Colleen and Danny left the building, followed by the others. Thankfully, the cab was still waiting for them so Misty sat next to the driver while Danny and Colleen slipped into the back seat. One last time, they waved at Jess and Luke who made their way to the subway station.
In silence, they walked for a while until Luke cleared his throat. “So, wanna meet tonight?”
“Yeah, sure.” Jess nodded
“Your place or mine?” Luke asked and frowned when she hesitated.
“Actually,” she finally said, “I was thinking we could go out? Have dinner first?”
Raising his brows, Luke grinned at her. “Going out?” he asked in fake scandalization. “As in ‘people might see us in public’?”
“Idiot,” she groaned. “But yeah. Like… a date or something.”
“A date or something,” he repeated. “Sounds romantic.”
“If you don’t want to, just say it,” she snapped.
Grinning, he held up his hands in a placating manner. “Sorry, sorry. Of course, I do. Where to?”
“Um, I hoped you’d pick something?” she said. “I’m good at finding bars and pubs, but restaurants and stuff… not my scene.”
Smiling, Luke took Jess’ hand. “I’ll think of something. Pick you up at seven?”
“Yes,” she said. “And don’t make me wait. It’s not sexy.”
Luke threw his head back, laughing.
“Noted, Ms Jones,” he said. “Noted.”
*
Misty left the taxi first. She wanted to pay half of the current fare, but Danny waved her out of the car.
“I got this, Misty,” he said. “I owe you. All of you.”
“You do,” she jested. “Much more than the cab drive covers. But I appreciate it. See you guys tomorrow.”
“Bye, Misty.”
As the cab drove off, Danny took Colleen’s hand again. “I was thinking,” he said. “Our last picnic was cut short so…”
“I didn’t want to spoil the mood back then,” she said. “But it is a bit cold for picnics outside or in abandoned buildings with no heat.”
“That’s why I was thinking about a picnic at home,” he said. “With someone else taking care of the food.”
Colleen giggled. “You’re saying, you want to go home and order Chinese food?”
“That’s exactly what I’m saying,” he said. Carefully, he added, “Though… the old dojo is not really our home anymore, is it? It’s yours.”
Squeezing his hand, Colleen smiled. She did not want to go too fast. While she loved Danny, he ran away from their relationship once. The last days had been crazy so whatever they were feeling now was definitely influenced by several rushes of adrenaline. But she wanted to try.
“Maybe,” she finally said. “But you’re always welcome.”
Sweetly, he returned her smile and cupped her cheek.
“Thank you.”
“If you behave yourself, of course.”
“Of course,” he said and leant in.
*
When Misty approached her door, the neighbor came out of his apartment.
“Hey, Misty,” he said. “Accepted a package for you this morning. Careful! Heavy.”
“Thanks, Lenny,” she said as she took it. “That was fast. I ordered those books yesterday.”
“Well, happy reading then!”
“Thanks!”
Misty carried the package to her kitchen table and opened it. The sight of several books on demons, vampires, sorcery and witchcraft greeted her. Grinning, she took out the first one.
She wouldn’t be scared of the things that go bum in the night. And they wouldn’t catch her off guard again.
*
Foggy unlocked the door to Matt’s apartment. Carrying his purchases inside, he called out unnecessarily. If Matt was home, he’d probably heard Foggy while he was still on the streets. There was no answer, but Foggy found Matt on his couch in a Lotus position. Like a scolded child, he sat unmoving, his unseeing eyes directed forward.
“You shouldn’t have,” he said after a while.
It hurt. The rational part of Foggy knew Matt heard the shopping bags rustle and was talking about getting groceries. But in the darker parts of Foggy’s mind it registered as a comment on saving Matt. Or on sleeping with him. Or both.
“Well, you need to eat,” Foggy said, trying to sound casual. “And you weren’t there for Doctor Strange’s final check up so I wasn’t sure if you’re already up for…”
“I’m fine,” Matt interrupted harshly. But then his voice softened and he said, “But… thank you.”
“No problem.”
In the following awkward silence, Foggy began to put the groceries away. Swallowing hard, he forced himself to speak. To say something, anything.
“The others are meeting for lunch tomorrow,” he heard himself speak. “I think I’m going, too. You want to come with me?” He winced inwardly. “Or… go alone? I mean I’ll be there… but we don’t have to go together… I just thought it…”
“How can you talk about lunch, Foggy?” Matt asked, voice strained.
“Well,” Foggy tried to smile. “While breakfast is the most important meal of the day, we should not underestimate the value of…”
“How can you even ask me to go lunching with you after what I did?”
“Um… I mean,” Foggy shrugged helplessly. “You’re healed so…
“Foggy!” Matt abruptly stood and turned to Foggy. “How can you be so… I forced myself on you!”
Foggy dropped the empty shopping bag. With quick steps, he crossed the room to get closer to Matt. Leaving a few feet between them, he lifted his arms, sure Matt could register it, in a calming gesture.
“Whoa, whoa, slow down, buddy,” he said. “That’s not what happened.”
“It’s exactly what happened,” Matt choked out.
“No, it’s not! I was there, Matty,” Foggy said. “I wanted it! I wanted you!”
“I used my power on you, Foggy,” Matt gave back. “I made you want me.”
“Guess, it still works then,” Foggy mumbled. Louder, he said, “Just… look, if we want to argue that your vampire powers made me want it, then we also have to argue that your vampire nature made you use those powers. Then we’re both victims.”
“That’s not…”
“Not the same? Why not, Matt? Because then you have no reason to beat yourself up?” Foggy asked. “No reason to push me away again?”
“I don’t…”
“No? Because you sure have a history of distancing yourself from me ‘for my own good’.” Foggy hated how desperate and frantic he sounded now, but he was desperate and frantic. He hadn’t risked his human existence to lose Matt now to one of his self blaming trips. “Newsflash, Matt! I always ate my vegetables so now I’m all grown out. An adult. I decide for myself what is good for me.”
“Foggy, I’m sorry,” Matt said genuinely. “The last thing I want is to lose you. It’s just that I feel I violated you.”
Foggy sighed. “As I said, if we want to see it that way, we’re both victims of the vampire curse. I’d rather we not see ourselves as this, but maybe as… if we could…”
“What do you mean?”
Gathering his courage, Foggy took a deep breath. “When we were in the office that night - after you and Danny had been infected - you said something. You said you want me, have wanted me for a long time and that you stopped denying yourself that.”
After swallowing hard, Matt nodded. “I remember.”
“Is it true?” Foggy asked, scared of the answer but needing to know.
“Yes,” Matt whispered.
“Can we maybe take that as one, maybe the one good thing to come out of that horror story for us?” Foggy asked. “That I know now? That I learned it’s not unrequited? That I can stop thinking that I’m completely hopeless and ridiculous?”
In one swift move, Matt closed the gap between them and grabbed Foggy’s hand.
“I never thought that about you,” he said urgently. “If anyone is hopeless and ridiculous, it’s me.”
“Oh, you sure are,” Foggy said, nodding his head.
At least, it got a smile out of Matt. “Yet, you’re here,” he said.
“Case in point, I am hopeless and ridiculous, but not completely,” Foggy smirked. More serious, he asked, “You knew, didn’t you? What I feel.”
“I… suspected,” Matt said. “I wasn’t sure. Let’s be honest, there is more than one reason in your life for an elated heartbeat. Plus, it got less… prominent over the years. Add that I don’t deserve you anyway and you know why I held back.”
“Remember, back then, as in ‘90 seconds ago’, when I told you how I make my own decisions?” Foggy said. “That includes what I deserve.”
“You deserve the Devil of Hell’s Kitchen?” Matt asked softly. “What did you do?”
“Oh, Matty,” Foggy sighed. “There is no Devil inside you. All those feelings you think are the Devil are very very human.”
“Yes,” Matt said bitterly. “And look what happens when I don’t contain myself.”
“What you did when you were a vampire, proves how good you are, Matty,” Foggy said. “I needed a curse to strip you of your humanity so you ‘let out the Devil’. Which means that he is normally pretty well contained inside human Matt Murdock.”
At that, Matt fell silent. Apparently, he was considering Foggy’s words.
Foggy looked down at their connected hands. Nervously, he interlaced their fingers and reveled in the warmth of Matt’s palm. There was no way he would let this chance go.
“I love you, Matty,” he said. “And I need you. I would never bully you into something you don’t want. But knowing that you do want it, I refuse to let you curl up in the corner, wrapped in a blanket of guilt and misery while I act like nothing happened.”
Chuckling, Matt pulled Foggy against his chest. “What? And let a perfectly fine guilt-and-misery blanket go to waste?”
The closeness, Matt’s body heat and that unfairly handsome smile made Foggy’s knees buckle. Bravely, he kept his voice even when he gave back, “Oh, I know you, Murdock. You’ll make a new one in no time.”
A second later, Matt's goofy smile was pressed against Foggy’s mouth. At first, their lips brushed in a chaste kiss. Soon Matt delicately licked along the seam of Foggy’s bottom lip, sweetly asking for entrance. Foggy was not one to deny Matt anything, so he opened up at once, allowing Matt to deepen the kiss. Groaning, Matt licked into Foggy’s mouth, tongue seeking out its counterpart, searching and claiming.
Their fingers disentangled. Instead their hands found each other’s bodies, taking their time to explore what was lost to the haze of the spell they’d been under during the last encounter. Slowly, their clothes fell, forming a messy pile of fabric on the ground.
“You’re really sure?” Matt asked when they were both naked.
“Hmmm.” Foggy stroked his own chin as if in deep thought.
“Foggy,” Matt warned and growled “No teasing. If you changed your mind, I suggest you run now, fast. If not, come here.”
Grinning, Foggy fell into Matt’s arms. Bringing their lips together, they threw the remaining shreds of doubt out.
Foggy indulged himself, kissing every inch of skin he’d unwrapped. With fingers and lips, he followed the map of scars on Matt’s toned chest. Humming approvingly, Matt took hold of Foggy’s hair, gently guiding him downwards. Bit by bit, Foggy had to bend lower to follow Matt’s wishes.
At some point, he found himself on eye level with Matt’s cock, thick, hard and already dripping. Foggy stopped, raised a brow at Matt and said, “Subtle, Murdock.”
“Not trying to be subtle, just trying to get your mouth on me.” When Matt tilted his head and smiled seductively, Foggy was done for.
Obediently, he sank to his knees and wrapped his lips around the head of Matt’s dick. Urged on by Matt’s greedy noises, Foggy bopped his head, taking Matt as deep as he could. He reveled in the salty, musky taste and the comforting warm weight on his tongue while Matt whispered praises above him.
As it turned out, a Matt, who was done denying himself, was quite insatiable. His hand still in Foggy’s hair, he used his lover’s mouth until completion. After pulling Foggy into a filthy kiss, Matt dragged him to the bedroom and did not let him rest for hours. Matt was a bit bossy as he took Foggy from behind on his satin sheets, whispering sweet obscenities. Or when he rode him afterwards, hands pressing down on Foggy’s soft chest. But Foggy was in no condition to complain while he was gasping and begging underneath Matt.
Exhausted, Foggy lay in Matt’s arms later. Lazily, he ran his fingers through the dust of dark hair on his lover’s chest while Matt played with his hair.
“Hey,” Matt said quietly.
“No way, you beast,” Foggy groaned, eyes fluttering shut. “I need to sleep.”
Chuckling, Matt kissed his forehead. “I know. Just wanted to ask you on a date. I heard some friends of mine are having lunch together.”
“Yeah, I’m coming, need to check these friends,” Foggy mumbled.
“They’ll love you.”
“Of course. I’m adorable.”
*
Matt listened to Foggy’s heart calming down and to his breath evening out. Sighing, he pulled the covers over them before curling himself around Foggy’s generous body. Feeling the soft skin underneath his fingertips grounded Matt, tethered him to the here and now.
Part of him was still not convinced he deserved this. But there was no going back now. No way he could have had Foggy like this and return to wishing and dreaming through the safety glass of their friendship. He treasured Foggy enough to treasure him as friend and lover.
Still, the guilt drew him back to his days under the vampire curse. Matt wished he could say his thoughts had not been his own. That this Matt, who was prepared to vanish into the night forever and drag his friends with him, was a completely different man. But vampire Matt’s way of thinking, rationalizing, planning - it was familiar. This Matt’s mind had worked like his own. The main difference was that vampire Matt was more selfish.
However, Foggy’s wish to take something good out of the whole ordeal made sense. Maybe Matt could have the best of both worlds. He could allow himself to be selfish now and again, hoping that now - that he had his moral compass back - he would find that balance between his own needs and the needs of others. Maybe the hero Daredevil and the man Matt Murdock could come out of this in a new, more stable equilibrium.
Underneath the blanket, Foggy turned. A cute snore escaped his nose and Matt chuckled fondly. For now they were safe and sound, wrapped in the protective cocoon of this moment.
Whatever lay ahead. Matt knew he would not have to face it alone. Jess, Danny, Luke, Misty and Colleen would fight crime on the street by his side. Karen would help him find the villains' secrets and get him drunk now and again. Foggy would be with him in court and in their office, wielding the law against the bad guys. And Foggy would be on his couch to describe movies or read a book to Matt. In his kitchen to cook with him - or for him. Foggy would be in his bed at night.
Matt would not be alone. Wasn’t that something?